Reviewed by Davey Mail
Mulan
Summary
Wild child Mulan can’t pour tea properly and so no-one will marry her and her Dad is pretty bummed about it as he wanted to rent her room out on AirBnB. Then some dude on a horse turns up and says there’s a big war going on and a dude from every house has to fight. Mulan’s dad is well up for it but he has a walking stick, so Mulan talks to a dragon with the voice of Donkey from Shrek and then cuts her hair off. Somehow she passes for a man (despite having a great arse and banging tits) and then fights with the lads, winning the war and getting with her Captain. Oh and there’s a random cricket that knocks about with them too.
Overall Impression
The whole thing seems very far fetched, the dragon and the lucky cricket I can get behind, but a women in the army? Not on my watch! And I don’t get why she cut her hair off when loads of the Chinese army dudes have long hair. Although I did like the emporer and his awesome Dumbledore beard. Hair and makeup did a great job.
**** Stars.
(Dis)Honest Reviews 